13 maj 2009

And one explanation later

I didnt have much time, neither did i not have much energy, to explain what i wrote last night.
But today, i think ive pulled myself together and i think im ready to put words into a happening.

Me and my boyfriend, are doing very good. I just wished, that sometimes, he would stop thinking about his drug-shit and start thinking about his girlfriend instead.
Two days ago, he asked me, if i wanted to move in with him. But how am i supposed to live, the life hes living, everyday? How am i supposed to be able to take, being 100 miles away from my friends. The answer, i cant come up with.

And what about his other bullshit? Later on today, hes sending me back home, so that he can hang out with his friend - his female friend. And i guess, it would be fine, if she wouldnt have told him, that she wanted him - loud, so i could hear it. Its pissing me off, that i cant say no, even though i want to, so bad.
But if we do move in together, theres nothing, hanging out with female friends without me. Thats for sure.

Maybe i should just come up with an excuse to stay, just so that i could beat the chick so hard so that she would learn, to not touch my man.

Plus, we've got all the other bullshit going on. I really do feel, like everytime i raise my voice, all the ears around closes down.

And im so sick of living in all this bullshit crap.
I wont take no more.

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