happy days and a happy new year from me to you <3

Maybe, finally, someone up there has seen me and thought - its her turn, to feel good, to be loved and to love back.

Its been a cold, but yet, so warm and nice day. Im steel freezing from the cold winter weather we're having, but inside, its like spring. A seed is growing to become a rose.

Tomorrow its New years eve, and its gonna be celebrated like never before. Ill be downtown Copenhagen, like ive always wished for. Ill be there, with the loves of my life and we're gonna rock it like no one has ever before. 

And fuck my born-bad-luck, tomorrow, im getting my new years kiss at 00.00. End of story. I dont care how many miles i have to run, how high up i have to fly, or how deep down i have to swim. Ill get it. I just hope, the right person will be standing there, next to me, because i only have 60 seconds to make it happen. 

Peace and love.

Tomorrow is the last day of the worst year, but its also the beginning of the best. 

A thoughtful night

Looking into your eyes still hurts. Thats simply why, i just dont do it anymore. 

Walking past, is still as nerve-breaking as it was the first time. 

Taking your hand, holding it tight, upsets me, because i know - you will be gone the next second. 

But what kills me the most, is being there, watching you, doing what you once did to me, to another girl.

Im not what i come off as, i am so much more and so much less. But i guess, yet, no one seems to see me for that person. They see me, as the one, they think i am. And the one wish, that someone would win me over and convince me theres good ones out there - never seem to come true. I want the good ones, who can bring out the best in me. 

Someone who actually gets to know me, and not the girl from the pictures.

Its Christmas, santa got the list but God never heard my prayers.

A fabulous night at IN. One of those nights, only possible to experience at the one and only - IN. 

A night, filled with surprises - good ones, and less good ones. But i must say, many things got done last night, that have been unfinished for too long. 

After a great Christmas, with the perfect gifts under the tree there was only one more thing i could wish for. You.

Its funny how i always seem to get what i want in the end, everything but you. And i think that is what keeps me holding on. I cant let go of the one thing, im not done with. And it bugs the shit out of me. But its alright though, this fight just makes my life a little bit more interesting than it would be without it.

And i must say, revenge is the best feeling. Being there, doing that, knowing - youre feeling the exact same thing i felt when you betrayed me brings sunshine to any gray day.

 -Ill keep stamping with my feet, 

doing it all night long,

to a badass techno song... -

My feet hurts. But i do not, i reapeat, i do not regret last night.

What if its true, that old love never dies? Theres a connection, im feeling, to you. A connection i cant explain nor know where i it came from. My only guess, is that its leftovers from our past.

So, what to do when those feelings pop up once more. Knowing how it ended the last time, not knowing if its gonna be the same this time. Take a shot or not to take a shot,

thats the question.

Christmas dreams

Im going to Miami and im getting a tatto from Ami. For real. That guy is the hottest thing my eyes has ever faced. To bad, he lives on the other side of the fucking globe. Sucks for me. But maybe, santa likes me this year - i can always wish for a mini-Ami for Christmas. 

Less than a week from now we'll all be overdosed with gifts, food and jingle bells rock. I cant believe its already Christmas time. Im still in October in my head. This past months have passed by like a Ferrari on Autobahn. Thats another thing on my list btw. 

What a perfect Christmas Eve that would be,

imagine me in the passanger seat of a red Ferrari, driven by Ami himself. Or even better, me driving Ami. 

I live for today.

I dont know what tomorrow brings,

but i know what i have right now,

and what i had yesterday.

I live for the moments,

during the late nights,

i wont remember,

with the people ill never forget.

I live with what ive got,

i do what i want,

and i regret nothing.

I rather loose an opportunity,

to become great,

than loose a second of being it.

A love letter to the future

Finally, i woke up from my party-coma and got out of my house. But its been a busy weekend, for sure. Work and school, did not make it any easier. At least, its winter break next week, and when thats over ive got one more semester in school and im done. Ill be fucking graduating, running around in those white hats with my bad ass girls, ready to get out into the real world. And i got it all planned out. Im gonna go straight into business, working and studying at a university. Ill be rollin in the hottest car, living in the greatest apartment, doing my thing. No boys, none of that love-bullshit. Just me and my friends, making the world jealous.

Just like me and Giulyy did last night. Ill give anything up, for another night, just like the last ones. 

My theory is, the reason the last ones have been as great as they have - is because im not hitting clubs to look for you anymore. Now days, I hit them, because of me.

Not because of you.

We're riding those limos like you ride your bike.

Tired and drunk. The state of my mind, this moment, this second. But what a night at IN. That place never disappoints. Details, tomorrow. Now, im speechless, im dead, i need my beauty sleep. 

And by the way, 

That limoride, is something i could get used to. 

Im keeping myself busy. And im stressing myself out. But thats alright, as long as im busy

Its not human, to be up and around like this. Im just waiting for my body and brain to break down. Today, ive been awake, doing important things, since 6 a.m. Now, its 10 p.m and i just got back from work. Busy schedule, for sure. But i dont mind it, because a busy one will keep my thought off of that one thing im not allowed to think about.

And what a party week! Two birthdays, one military thing, huge party at IN, a dinner - actually two and lets not forget, Lucia.

Busy

busy

busy

All the years we've spend together. You and me, me and you. Forever and ever.

Pictures, to make us never forget what we once had, and what we do have.

And i just cant wait,

to spend the rest of my life,

right here - by your side,

forever. 

Making memories, to take with me,

down under the day i die.

I will always love you,

my very best friend.

Ida <3

Miracles do happen. Just not to me.

Last night, it hit me, like a star falling from the sky - right down on me. Im speechless, i dont know what to do. I cant sleep, i cant concentrate, im all rapped up. I feel sick, because i dont know what else to feel.

The charger connected to my phone, i turn it on.

I walk down the stairs to get something to eat,

while my teddy bear is vibrating,

but i hear nothing.

I go to work.

I come home.

Im thinking,

its time to unplug that charger.

And when i do,

i fall, a thousand miles under ground. 

And what about what i want?

Tomorrow is a day to remember. Its Monday, and for most of us, no big deal. But for me, its a big test waiting at 10.30 in school. And guess what, i havent even bothered to open my book yet. 

I have this theory though, if its a C i want, ill make it by just listening during class. I wont have to study, because a C is equal to basic knowledge - and basic knowledge is something you should get from just attending the class. 

This theory has never been tested, but tomorrow it will. Because im sick and tierd of spending time on homework, during my spare time - where im supposed to be doing whatever i like. 

Maybe i should become a politician. Fight for the right of relaxing, when your home. Ive never understood this whole homework thing, 

im in school 8 hours a day,

when i get home, i barely have time to eat,

because i always have homework with me home from school.

And i thought that grown-ups had a hard time.

Hah.

In my ass. 

When your working, at least, you get off work, whenever you get off.

You dont get out of school, until graduation.

Im home, and ive never felt better.

Confirmation, was exactly what i was looking for. One that told me, im good enough. I am what i am, and there's people out there who loves me for it. I needed to know that i was living my life to the fullest, and no matter what it would take - i was willing to give it up for that one, confirmation.

And now, i finally understand how a weekend, that is not filled with parties, still can be a great weekend. And i realize why i still feel satisfied from just watching tv a friday night, when i could be at a club rocking it. Its because im done. 

Ive reached my goal and now, theres nothing that attracts me at clubs, nothing but having fun with my friends. Theres no more, i need, i want, i must...

Im done with one night stands,

done with getting way to wasted, 

done with being the dumb blonde,

and the easy one.

And i guess, i was right from the start,

this is the phase that will lead me down the path, of growing up.

And its true, that one saying,

"You dont grow up,

until you've learned how to be a child"

And things start to fall into place

Really, ive got nothing to complain about. Ive got everything i need and a little more. I have the money, the family, the grades - you name it. But still, its just like something is missing. How about happiness? 

You know, there is nothing that piss me off more than people who takes you for granted. Who knows that you'll do just about anything for them. Those who predict how you're gonna go about something, and that you'll stand by their side. 

And there is nothing worse than people who dont know what they got until they loose it. Perhaps, someone who takes advantage of your kindness shares the number one trophy of the worst things. 

Think about it, 

and im sure you'll see,

that i dont like you that much as you might think.

Im on a walkout.

This is what i should be doing,

reading about islam. 

writing a novel.

and finish the last chapter in my psychology book.

And this is what im doing,

watching tv.

talking to friends.

and writing in my blog.

And now, im gonna continue on to facebook. 

Screw school,

im smart enough to not fail anyways.

If i could, i would delete love.

Every now and then i think about the future, i imagine my life and i see everything, as perfect as it could be and in those dreams, i always get my happily ever after. In reality, i just dont.

The story of my life. Born with bad luck, and died from it to.

So whats up, well, its a Friday night and just as the last one im sitting at home, at decent hour, doing nothing but writing my heart out in my blog. Pathetic? Hm. Yes, maybe. But no matter, how depressing it might be - i still kind of like it. I think its a sign of me, growing up. What does hurt is that i can do nothing about it. I seem to struggle and im desperately trying to avoid this stage, where i no longer plan for partying all weekend - where a movie with some popcorn is just fine to satisfy my needs. But i guess, it is impossible to stop.

I love partying, dont get me wrong. But im just not running after everyone in party hats trying to crash anymore. Instead, i wait for them to come around.

The worst part is,

im not even working tomorrow. 

But i am, sunday.

Which means, tonight was my only chance.

But i decided to watch a movie in town.

Play pool.

And i drove.

Well...

People change

No more music in my ear. Im done with love songs.

Im serisously counting down. One hour and 45 minutes left until my pay check is available at my bank account. And i need it like ive never needed it before.

And by the way, this is my 100th entry. Wow. Lets celebrate!! With some depressing stories about my life and about this weekend. 

It might be friday tomorrow, but what am i doing? My best friend is always with her boyfriend, my other best friend is working 24/7, and my third is baby-sitting. Whats up with that?! Huh?! Leaving a desperate, sad and depressed girl all alone on a friday night? All im saying is that this time, im not fine and im not gonna be ok.

Not.

Anyhow, i was sitting on the bus on my way from school when i thought, hey, lets put on some music. For once, i have my Ipod with me and its charged. Wow. 

And then i realized,

no matter how much I shuffled those songs, or how many times a pressed "Next", they were all about the same thing. Love aka Sex.

Id be the first one to buy the next song that is Not about love aka sex. Because im so sick of it. 

"So sick of love songs...."

And im sorry for being so depressed today - or actually, im not. 

It was the first day of school in like four weeks and we all know how horrible the first day of school always seem to be. 

Back to homework, back to feeling guilty for not doing them and back to sitting down, quiet, doing whatever the teacher asks you to. I bet, if the teacher told someone in school to jump out the window from the third floor - the student would do it and then ask for compensation for damages. Thats how damn good we are at doing what our teachers say.

Fuck The System.

Thats what i say...

Leaving the life of Cph

So here i am for the last time. And soon ill be in my own, precious bed,  in my room, watching my tv and listening to my music. I must say, that no matter how much i love everything about Copenhagen, and no matter how much i wish i actually had my own apartment here - Malmo will still be home, sweet home. 

And yes, i will miss living in the biggest city in Scandinavia and its gonna suck, taking the train in an eternity after partying at IN - but i am, believe it or not, happy to come back home.

In 40 minutes ill be gone- if my parents can figure the streets of copenhagen out. Hah. 

Ive had my playboy moments.

My crazy ones,

and my low ones.

Ive been through changes,

as a punk rocker,

as a princess,

to a fat one,

to almost anorexic,

to what i am today.

I regret nothing.

Nothing, but the things i never did.

Like that one night,

i was supposed to meet you by the train station,

and i never showed up.

Or that one time,

he was cheating,

and i never spilled my drink on him,

hit him,

nor started a fight.

But i learn from my mistakes,

luckily,

i do.

And i wont let myself,

never again,

be regretful.

Living life to its fullest potential,

dying poor. 

A destiny,

of the real me.

Somebody is falling in love. And its not me.

Stop.

I need to stop torturing myself. I need to get over what i never got over. I need to get over myself. Come on. I am pathetic. Staying in love, hoping one day he'll come back. Newsflash! He's never turning around. So you might just as well walk the other way. 

Pep-talk.

Tomorrow will be a sad day. My last day living in Copenhagen. Wonderful Copenhagen. But it is also a new day with a new kick-off. When i sit down in that car, and when i start the engine heading home - im not only driving away from something. I am driving towards a life, that is more than ready to take over the world.

This is as good as it gets

First of all, why dont i sleep anymore? 

Some early shopping ended up being worthless. Straight to work, over energized, so ready for the night. And at 4.30 p.m my rescue came. Next stop - home.

A couple of drinks, actually, more than a couple made our threesome a little bit more exciting. Even though, hours of waiting until Copenhagen's nightlife  started blew our party-mood away. But with headaches, hungry stomachs and cold feet we still made it to IN. And im so glad we did. 

Dancing all night long, forgetting problems and living to the fullest. This is what i love and cant stop loving. 

We made a new bartender friend too. I expect free drinks next time, aight? And hey, if we really are securities favorite swedish girls - why arent we in VIP line yet? 

Whatever.

Last night was one of those nights, i'll never forget. And that one dance with that one guy, those crazy glasses, the flashing camera lights, the smiles from my IN-crew and the world being upside down - literary. All memories i wish never ended. But at nine o'clock, i had no other choice than to let it go.

And suddenly i can clearly see what its all about.

Movies, candy and the love of my life. It all makes a bad ass Friday night.

Carrie in sex and the city. You are one of a kind. Waiting 10 years for a man, that must be true love. The love that is in every fairy tale and the one we all dream about. 

Its 1.30 in the morning and you might wonder what the hekk a party princess is doing at home writing in her blog at this time. Keep wondering, because i dont have the answer. 

And what about that thing at Disko Dasko? Hm, we walked passed it, but thats it. And what about Dansebaren? Nope, we just passed that one too. Seven eleven and a bad ass movie was what caught our eyes tonight. And what a night! 

But hey, the weekend is far from over. Tomorrow its saturday and who knows what will happen then... All i know is, it all will happen at IN. 

See you there

Its happening all over Copenhagen this weekend

Tonight it's hip hop on the schedule for Disko Dasko in Copenhagen. I'm thinking about going. Hm. A real battle, a bad ass Dj and cheap alcohol. But im not going alone. I might be independent, but im not desperate. Anyone who wants to join me?

Hah. Not desperate... Good one.

One more week in Copenhagen, then its time to go back home. And i must say, Copenhagen is all i want, its all i ever desired and all i'll ever need. Its mother fucking Copenhagen dude. The city i love. Pretty sure, i was born on the wrong side of the water. 

Anyhow, im planning on enjoying my last week, my last weekend in the big city. Saturday night i have two options, Rainbow at Renome or IN. 

Hard choice. 

But hey, its friday. No worries. Let the party begin and let it end wherever the night takes us.

And ill keep on writing forever.

My source of inspiration. Ive found it.
And you wont believe me when i tell you, who it is.

Well, its not my mom. Its not my friends. Its not a teacher and its not a famous person. Its not anyone close to me, but neither is he far away.

What makes me do my worst, is what makes me do my greatest.

Are you getting closer to the answer?
One more clue.

7 months.

Still lost? Yes, its understandable. But im not really known of writing in clear text. Its about reading whats in between the lines. It makes the writing more personal, but still - so abstract.

Anyhow. Are you ready for the answer?
Of course, duh, its The One.

The one i gave it to,

the one who broke it.

The one i loved,

the one who never loved me back.

The one i wished for every 11.11,

the one who didnt care.

The one and only,

who had me,

who took it all,

who will always be in my heart.

The one and only,

T.

You still inspire me to do my best, to fight and to achieve, because deep inside of my heart theres always going to be a desire to get you back and to make you want me.

The best thing is, you'll always be that source of inspitation. Because im not stupid, i also know, you'll never take me back.

Home for rehab. And today its coffee time with a friend. 

Then, im going to IKEA to anoint the Christmas. Im sick of everything being dark and boring. Its time to get some light in our existence. Warm colors, goodie snacks and Glögg.

I love Santa. 

Work tomorrow again. Woho. 

But then, i got nothing in my calendar until Sat. 

Saturday night its you and me Ida. Rocking the dance floor. Because no one dances like we do. Trust me on that one.

Bounce

And it went crashing down the drain.

Did you ever take time,

to read what i wrote about you?

I dont think you did.

You would have known,

how i felt,

how i feel,

and what i hoped to feel.

I wrote about love,

and about trust.

I said something about hope,

and something about happiness.

Something about reality being better than dreaming.

I gave you what i had,

and a little bit more.

But money cant buy love,

nor can it heal a broken heart.

The End.

Sensation. Sen-fucking-sation.

Amazing. 

White.

Huge.

Wow...

Still, IN wins when it comes down to choices of music, beat and people. But oh, it loses against Sensation when it comes to area, shows, unity and Bad Ass. What was a huge disappointment was that there was no black light. I mean WHAT?! No black light at sensation White?! Fake, fake, fake. And expensive drinks in cheap glasses was not a plus either.

But still, 30 000 people in one place who all wants the same - party hard and listen to the djs making the world go around - is indefinable. 

After-party at IN was a blast - until you-know-what happened. Fuck it ruined my night. Fuck this, fuck you and fuck everything.

Im done.

Showtek in my heart.

This is what I love and cant stop loving.
Get wasted on parties from 9 to 7 in the morning.
I live for the music, more than once,
feeling high, Getting loaded or take some pills and go to "LaLa" land.
Spending all my money on dope and extreme hot price tickets.
But in the end its all worth it!
I like to live in my own world.
Fuck regular life, fucking nine to five jobs.
I told to enjoy every moment, every hour, every minute.
That is what I do at friday's and saterday's.
Why should I take life so seriously, I just wanna do what I like to do.
Being far from reality, because I cant stand society.
This is my own world, I just wanna hear the music...

I think the whole system fucking sucks.
Everybody is working his fucking ass off during the week.
Getting totally fucking stressed out,
So whats wrong and whats right!

I live for the weekend.
I live for hardstyles.
I live for hardstyle baby!

Come on, let's go!

Its that feeling you have before a long vacation, before Christmas or before graduation. You're all excited and you've got everything planned out. The outfit is sitting there, just waiting to be put on. You want to stay up all night, but in the same time you want to sleep so that time will pass by faster. 

You're nervous.

You're happy.

Its almost like falling in love. This sensational feeling. And i just cant wait until tomorrow. I wanna scream, i wanna jump up and down, i wanna share my happiness with the rest of the world. Even though, time goes by fast. Occasions like these, it always seem to go by so slow though. And i would not mind if time went by just a little bit faster. 

I want it to be saturday right now.

Right away.

NOW.

S for saturday and S for sensation <3

One more day of waiting and then Sensation will finally be here. Im feeling bad for poor IN. No one will come until after 3ish. An empty club. Then we'll come and crash the party. 

So a couple of good advises for all you Sensation freaks,

dont overdose - a true party killer is blue and red lights.

drink water as much as you drink anything else - we have a long night ahead of us.

dress in white and drop all your arguments about how white isnt your color. 

and last but not least,

get crunk.

And now finally, my outfit is complete. But no, you cant see it. Not until tomorrow. But its bang boom boom. Yup. 

I don't know. 

Why i fuck everything up.

Its like whatever i touch, turns into shit. 

And everything i stop touching, shines like never before.

Detox. Im detoxing everyone from me. 

You got it once.

If you loose it,

its forever gone.

Patience is not one of my high qualities. I prefer things to happen now, right away and i hate waiting. Waiting in line, waiting for the bus or even waiting for someone coming around. 

Waiting sucks - waiting is a waste of time and God should delete it from his system.

Today i had a real dinner for once. Arent you surprised? Well, i am. I actually cooked. I made food. I did not burn it, or overcook it. It tasted good. My food. Wow.

Plans for tonight include a good movie, some ice-cream and i guess, i gotta study as well. Hm. Yeay. But ill get a good nights sleep at least. And thats good, because i need it. And tomorrow its a new day at work.

After tomorrow its friday, and ill probably go home friday night to spend the night with my family and friends in Sweden. After that its saturday. And on saturday its...

SENSATION. 

And my mind is set for you.

Still doing it.

Afraid of hurting, afraid of giving it up again - knowing the risks. Im scared to death. And this time im facing my fear.

With another sleepless night and another day at work im still alive. And tonight its time to recover. Ill be washing clothes, cleaning and studying. Doesnt sound to fun, but it needs to be done to clear my conscience. Another bad day. But tomorrow i wanna see changes. 

Im going back to Sweden and ill be picking up my drivers licence, im going to the liberary to get some information about my project work and the best thing - im getting my Ipod back. God, ive missed it. My cutie who keeps me going - always.

Sensation on saturday. Its gonna be bad ass. 

Fucked up day. Seriously... WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME?!

Yesterday, after walking around in Copenhagen all day i must admit - my feet hurt shitless. But since when has pain stopped me from doing what i want? It ended up being another night at IN. Clearly, i was not going to be able to stay as long as usual. I told myself i had to leave at 1. At the latest. 

Good music and drunk as hell didnt help getting me home at a decent hour. 

What got me out of that place was my Ex. When he showed up, i left. Cant even stand seeing his face. 

Still, i wasnt home until 3.3o that night. Might not sound too bad, unless work is waiting at 9. I simply did some pep-talk and set my alarm clock. At 7.30, it rang. But 4 hours of sleep, a long day of shopping and another night at IN i slept like the sleeping beauty. And no, i did not hear my phone. 

Sun shining in my face was my savior. At 11.30 i finally woke up, looking like hell and feeling like shit. Showers makes wonders and so does make-up. What it wont help against is a mad boss. Fuck.

After work, going home, getting some rest and some real food for once didnt even cross my mind. Straight to my friend i went and woops - all of a sudden it was a new day. At 12.30 a.m i left his apartment to take the train. Obviously, i never thought of the fact that the buses might not drive this late a sunday night. Not until i got of at the central station, downtown copenhagen it hit me - hm. No more buses for tonight. To plan B - a cab. Hm. No cash? No working credit card? Sorry, no cab. 

Luckily, i thought, the subway is still going. It goes all night. Always. 

A 20 minutes walk and a tired me arrived to the subway to face my bad luck once more. Of course theres no subway this late. 

Stuck in Copenhagen, no where to go. Work in the morning at 10 and a need of some rest i still didnt panic. Nothing can stop me from getting what i want. Theres always a way. Always. 

Another hour past by and yes. There it was - an ATM. 

10 dollars later i was home.

Shit me im hungover.

Guess what i did last night?! Okay, let me give you a couple of clues, Special D, free champagne and bad ass people. Its IN, of course. 

Running on no more than 4 hours of sleep, empty stomach and a hell of a headache - ill be hitting downtown in a few. Ida is coming over and its gonna be a long day with girl talk and shopping. The fact that ive got blisters all over my feet and barely can walk from last nights insisting in High heels, wont stop me. Life is to short to complain.

And i have one more thing to confess. If your not sitting down - sit down. Take a deep breath. Here it goes.

Last night, me, Kristine Johanna Assarsson, didnt touch a soul but my friends. Im not gonna say too much here, but one thing is clear. Something weird is happening. Either im turning gay, or im actually... 

falling in love. 

It's about time you left.

First comes denial. 

And still everything is fine.

Then comes realizing.

And you blame yourself. 

Must be something you did wrong.

At last comes accepting.

And you can clearly see that you'll never be her.

The worst part is though,

that you've known all along,

that every time he looked into your eyes,

he saw somebody else.

"I want to be the eyes that look deep into your soul 

I want to be the world to you 

I just want it all 

I want to be your deepest kiss 

The answer to your every wish 

And all you'll ever need"

And another happy ending.

And of course, the celebration of my ever lasting drivers license didnt stop thursday. 

Friday night i was the DD for the first time of my life. Wow. Not being an alcoholic for a night every once in a while has its ups and downs. The down part - everything seems lame. The up part - going home in a nice warm car with good music beats most of the buses around this area.

But i still made sure i made it up saturday night. 

After some ticket problems and a long day at work, it was time to chill out at my new favorite place. 7-eleven at the airport. The night is young and it didnt really get started until some time after midnight. 

The place to be was IN (big shocker there). Next, V.I.P line.

Boom.

Boom.

Boom.

Hit after hit and i kept falling.

Seriously, clear the fucking street. Kristine is coming through

And a couple of thousand dollars later - shes driving legally. 

Ive been googling, searching and thinking - looking all over for that perfect outfit. Let me tell you, its not easy to find something white going towards darker times. And trust me, if you find something its not the correct white tone. And if its the right tone, its not the right fit. 

I hate white. 

Tomorrow the everlasting search continues. 

First - beauty sleep. A very long weekend is around the corner.  

Nervous shitless.

Hello social butterfly. Tongue tied and not even writing comes easily. 

Tomorrow is killing me and i just want to get it over with. 

But ill nail it. 

I will.

Cuz ive got no other option. 

End Of Story.

At least its not cancer.

Its been a long day. And i hate doctors. But dont get me wrong, i admire them for their brave work and for what they do for the society - they're just not my kind of people. They basically scare the shit out of me.

After my appointment with the devil himself, it was time to walk the waters. And im still amazed  how a place can feel so much like home - when its really not. 

Cheers to copenhagen, ill be back soon. 

Score!

A day to remember. 

I made it, three weeks of constant studying and hard work finally paid off. I passed part one of The big test. 

But lets not celebrate and pop the champagne until part two is over. 

Lets hope though, that my luck wont leave me quite yet. Tomorrow i have my doctors appointment and lets pray for good news. Otherwise, cheers to the great diet im going to be on for the rest of my life...

 

Yes,

Waking up this morning was not that bad. But looking in the mirror was.

I've got bruises all over my legs and my upper body is filled with scratches. The strange thing is, i didnt feel anything last night. They were just there when i woke up. Hm.

And i just cant wait until the next weekend <3.

This is what i live for.

98, my lucky number and the secrets of a long night.

Lucero, you're so right. Blog comes first, then sleep.

Feeling like a V.I.P, getting pictures taken by random people and getting drinks from here and there. Maybe my boobs actually are helpful in the search of the catch of the night. And maybe the dance floor is better than the bar.

A horrible day with a perfect end. 

From 12 to 6, me and my girls where rocking it. Actually, me and the boy were, while the others - at the end were all sitting down half awake. 

But hey, let me share one of me secrets. Drink it up and breath in - it keeps you going until your body falls apart. 

And everybody who chose to stay home instead of going to IN, you made a huge mistake. Tonight was a guys night. Good looking too. All of them...

almost.

But there was still one who caught my eye. One in a million - and the simple reason why i love club nights like this one. I would be nothing without a crush at the end of the night. 

Keyword, Temptation

What to do, when youre falling and you've got no one to fall with nor anyone who will catch you at the bottom? 

I would take the hit, get up, and make sure ill never walk down that path again. What might sound easy in the theory, is not the easiest to do. Because what brought you down there in the first place, will still be as tempting as it once was. And the motivation, the feeling you felt when you hit the ground, is almost forgotten.

The brain forgets the bad and remember the good - our own self-defense in a nut-shell. 

But i wonder how it would end, if someone would care enough to take the fall with me. Or how i would feel if there would be someone catching me? 

Id probably feel better. But it would still not save me from not falling again.

And suddenly I see clear,

what to do,

and what not.

One more week of school. 

Just one more.

Four weeks of vacation is waiting.

And im ready to hit it.

The worst one so far.

Whats happening to the world? Another saturday night with a bad beginning, horrible story and terrible ending.

The pre-party turned into some kind of puking party, where my purse got the boom. And no doubt about it, it stinks. 

HedKandi was out of control when we arrived, so we never went inside.

And Denmark, our savior let us down as well. 

So without a purse or keys we gave up and went back home, in the rain with our high heels on.

Even the biggest bitch can change her mind to turn around and swallow her pride. So here I am, with two tickets that i said id never except. 

But who says ill actually turn up?

Friday, only a night away.

Tomorrow theres a weekend waiting and a Kristine without plans. 

Friday night is somewhat planned. Theres a private party that i cant miss out on. But what about Saturday?

A club event called Hed Kandi is whats happening. Whats not happening, is me paying for those tickets. Expensive and not worth it. And i thought my friend would come to my rescue. She gets tickets for free and HEY, im right here. 

Unfortunately, not only me wants those tickets. So when it comes down to it, Kristine Might get the tickets - might not. Hm.

Newsflash! Theres no maybe in baby. If im not her first choice, im obviously not That important to have around. And guess what? When the queen becomes low-class is when i show up at a place too good for me. 

Never happening.

The mysterious man.

Some would say, just another wednesday has now passed by. Others would not agree to that. Others, like me. 

Strange things has happened. And strange people have been calling me all day. One from Stockholm, one from "the wedding planners" (whos getting married?!) and the mysterious man. I have seen strange things and done things i normally dont do. And i think that was just the right cure for my downhill mood swings im having.

Despite the rain and the wind, its been a good day with an happy ending.

Its now time to dream about my prince. And oh how handsome he is.

Fast and furious. Warning warning warning!!! Kristine will soon be on the road.

Today at 12.30 i officially past my first part of the driving test. And it was the most fun thing ive ever experienced. 

The whole point of the test, was to drive crazy and to spin around with the car. Breaking hard in 50 miles and hour, driving in a curve with water on the ground and trying to get around deers on the road. 

The day started out great. 

But then it was time for my doctors appointment. As usual, i fainted, fell of the chair with the needle in my arm and the next thing i know theres a big crowd around me.  

If i only had that someones hand to hold.

Because it is lonely,

being that helpless,

and feeling so lost.

Changing goals.

All i know is, that what i am doing right now and the person that i have became - is not who i want to be. Im disappointed in myself. Being that, hurts more than knowing everyone else is too. Because when it comes down to it, its about how i feel towards myself that matters. And what hurts the most, is my own illusion about not being good enough. 

The ironic thing, is that is my own standards that makes me feel this way. And there is an easy way out - lower the standards, because obviously theyre too high. 

So this weeks challenge, is to start excepting im not born to be on top of the class. The only things i should be on top of, is a guy. 

heartbreakers in my own house.

What i thought was impossible happened. A magical night, where water turned into wine. 

Never thought i would be able to create my own hot spot right here. And i think i have a new favorite club. My house.

The best thing with private parties is that you can actually do whatever you like whenever youd like to do it. The entrance is free, theres an open bar and all V.I.P sections - and the best thing is, you are your own DJ. 

At the end of last night a surprise came a long. The one and only ive been waiting for the past couple of years. And suddenly im once again stuck with butterflies and romantic dreams. 

But oh no, as good as it might sound, there is a catch as always. Born with bad luck, im stuck with feelings that i shouldnt feel - everyone knows, he belongs with her. 

Friday night. A less successful one.

I never thought these words were gonna come out of my mouth... But IN seriously sucked dick last night. The Jukebox - a total Flop and a total party killer. And where did all the hot guys go? Not to IN, thats for sure. And how come, both me and Ida left without anyone to dream about? 

Cheers to all you 40+. You have now officially taken over the best party place in Copenhagen and left us youngsters behind. 

Maybe there is a god anyways. And if there is, he reads my blog.

The brightest light is only to be found after the darkest tunnel. 

Yesterday i cried myself to sleep. And let me tell you, i do not recommend it, because waking up in the morning hurts your eyes. Plus, your red and swollen and look like you all of a sudden are allergic against your pillow.

But i made it through another day.

A day that turned out to have a blue sky,

with many great things to give.

I past two of the 7 tests i have to get done at Drivers Ed,

I drove around downtown in the worst traffic - and no one died.

And last, but not least,

I got the great news from my fabulous friend that i have an apartment waiting for me in Amager November 5th. Yes!

Warning, sensitive readers. This text includes depressing contents

If your having a great day, please stop reading here.

I HATE THE WORLD!

And no, im not on my period. 

Things are completely stressing me out. Im feeling exhausted from just waking up in the morning. Sign number one of being wiped out. And all ive been doing all day long is complaining about how bad things are going for me right now - and how bad things will go for me in the future. Yes, i guess i all of a sudden became a predictor of the future. 

I dont know what is going on with me but nothing seems to help. Eating chocolate is not even working for me anymore. Thats sign number two. Something must be wrong! Either its me whos going crazy, or its the world thats going crazy. Im guessing, its me.

But on the other hand, my schedule is not very easy for a none-machine to get through. Doctors appointments - homework - drivers license - drivers ed - french people - friends - parties - Gossip Girl - and the list keeps going forever.

Many things to do in not enough time.

Lets pause life - just for a moment.

And if there is a God out there,

Just give me a break! PLEASE!

A different kind of Monday night.

Ive never before seen the point of going out on a monday until now. 

Me and a couple of friends decided to meet up downtown for a coffee-break. The break that turned in to a beer-break. And sitting there, at the bar, listening to some badass music with alcohol in your blood is something we all need every once in a while. But doing it a Monday night, with school at 8 the day after? Believe me, its more successful than you might think. Kind of reminds me of the Danish way of living. Because for some reason, ive noticed that most Danish people could care less about the day of the week - or the time of the day. A beer is always as good.

So my tip of the day would be,

go out if you want to,

its worth it.

Youre worth it.

The ever lasting fight between blondes and brunettes. Will it ever com to an end?

What if its true? What if blondes do have more fun? 

This weekend the blondes won, thats for sure.

But ill have my revanche this upcoming weekend. Dont worry. 

What the plans are, is still something undecided. 

All i know is that there will be living a man under my roof. What we're gonna do and what parties we're gonna crash is something we're still trying to figure out.

Im just saying,

Prepare to get crunk. 

And the most depressing night of the year has now begun.

Woho.

Let's celebrate...

...with some Gossip Girl and P.S I Love You

A balmy weekend

It was def a different kind of friday night yesterday. 

Actually, this whole weekend is just fucked up. 

Kind of reminds me of the ones i used to have back in the days.

Yesterday was mine and my mom's annual shopping day. As always we went to Copenhagen with one thing on our mind - to buy what is not to be found anywhere else but in the heart of C. 

The day was successful and the night was Wow.

At 5 p.m a fashion show started in one of the biggest malls. Of course, we had V.I.P access where champagne and snacks were offered. As good as the Champagne tasted, as good were our seats. In front of the runway, but not too close. After the show was over, we did some late night shopping to later on with killing feet take the train home.

And God i'm glad we had our car at the train station. Because the bus would've not worked for me this time. 

But whats so surprising was that i was in Denmark, a friday night without partying and i came home in a decent hour. That's worth a golden medal. It has never happened before. 

And the worst part is that its saturday and i still don't have any plans on getting wasted and doing crazy stuff.

Am i growing up?

Youre Nobody Until Youre Talked About

True words straight from Gossip Girl. 

And now I'm hooked too. 

When the show first came out, i was one of the few standing against the peer-pressure. I was not watching a single show. But something happened on my way to Gothenburg, Sweden. 

The car ride was getting boring and riding on highways is not very exciting. Especially not if you're in the middle of the backseat, uncomfortable and mushed in. 

And there I was, watching one episode of Gossip Girl - hooked like it was coke. 

It was dangerously good.

So here's to all you Gossip Girl addicts. 

I understand you.

And I admit,

I wish my blog was like Gossip girl's. 

xoxo

Jukebox instead of hardcore?

IN - think again.

But... I'm not going to be the one who judges before I've tried it out. Next weekend, here i come. And maybe, the amount of drugs will decrease, since dancing crazy with X is not quite the same unless you have hardcore music in the background. 

Then again, for real, food? Radio-chillout music? Could be good. 

Doubt it will become better than from what it really is.

And yes, Im a criticizer. 

A different kind of Saturday night.

A best friend, with someone she's not supposed to be with? 

Closed doors.

Half-empty glasses. 

Music loud enough, to not be able to hear shit.

But my eyes were still open,

and my mind was functioning. 

And not even money can buy forgiveness in this case. 

Even though, I'm an expert in overreacting, 

a best friend should know. 

But, lucky me. 

The bus ride on my way home had a few surprises it self. 

One of them was eye-candy.

And the eye-candy kept talking,

with a sweet voice to soothe my ears. 

Suddenly, things seemed ok again. 

I found my way to IN this weekend too.

And the weekend has just started. 

Report straight from bed, about IN. Because there's where things happen.

It seemed like one of those lame nights, with too many underaged, bad music and irritating people. But then Dj Sash came and things turned to the better. Wow. 

I had sex on the dance floor,

was in contact with X,

and walked away with my best friends boyfriend.

I love when it sounds so dirty. 

But i love it even more when its true.

Nighty night. 

Thinking things might not be so bad.

As my world is falling apart, im still standing. And as everything is shaking, ill be the last one to fall.

I know, perfection is an illusion for everyone but myself.

I can only be perfect for me - and nobody else. 

Give me a bad boy with the fries and coke to go, please.

I want the most bad one of them all. I want the one with a big record and tattoos. The one who drinks to much and drive crazy. The one with no education but still has the brain. And i want him to be sent in a package right to my door. Thank you very much.

Maybe not. But I do want someone crazy who can make my boring life exciting. Because im crazy sick of always following the rules and doing exactly what the ones up there tells me to.

I wanna be that teenage rebel i never was. And i want someone who can accept me being that rebel. Debating in my head, i came to the conclusion that only someone twice as crazy can do that. And who fits better in that picture than a gangster? Plus, a real one usually has those big muscles and nice body and they can protect you like your own body guard. Nothing is sexier than that. 

A busy weekend with no monday as result.

I'm totally wiped out from this weekend. And no, i did not go to school today. 

Interesting story there actually. I went to our first class - at 10.30. But no body was there. Hm? 

Then i realized that our psychology was cancelled and i went back home. THATS were i made the huge mistake. Going home, after being in town first is not a good idea. Because who seriously has the energy to go back? Not me. 

Friday was a good day with a great night.

Saturday... well lets just put it like this, i had fun until i got home - at 10 p.m. 

Sunday was a day with shopping all night long. Not a recommended thing to combine with a bad hang over. 

And even though i told myself to never drink again...

there's a weekend coming up and ME is NOT working.

 

STUPID ALLERGIES!

Waking up in the morning with a huge face and small swollen eyes is NOT acceptable. Damn cats and damn allergies. 

The good thing about it was that I had a reason to stay at home. Woho. 

Sometimes i wonder, if there is a God, why does he take everything i love away from me? 

Now, i found out im allergic to milk. Fuck that! And me... who LOVES hot chocolate during winter. But those days are over. 

Shit me.

Tomorrow, its friday. Finally.

Seriously, why does the week have to suck dick?

Wednesday and only two more days in school. Come on guys, we can do this. Because the weekend will make the week worth it. 

Friday night me and Ida are going to have our Sleepover that we've been talking about for God knows how long. It was something we used to do when we were young and a sleepover was all we needed. These days we're busy busy with things and no more time for being at home. 

And btw, congrats to the Doctor Ida. Enjoy your date tomorrow ;) I'm not jealous, no... not at all. A doctor, good looking and so sweet. Who would want that?

Saturday night its Ladies night and the dress code is... PINK!!! 

So if you see 8 tumbling Pink girls walking down the streets of Malmö on saturday night, it's probably us.

And we broke our record

Saturday night turned out not quite as planned but still, quite good. 

After a long day at work for both me and Ida we decided to go out and celebrate her one week of being single. Yes! Dinner for two, grilled salmon and some white wine with that - mhm. Havent tried it? Do it! But what is a celebration without dessert? So we bought ourselves waffles with hot chocolate sauce and ice cream. Delicious!

After that we had a little after party at IN. Which surprisingly turned out to be a short visit. We were both tired and wanted to go home at 2.30 a.m. I know... WHAT?! But yes, we went back to Sweden to sleep. I was home at a decent time for once and i broke my IN record in leaving early. Have never happened before - me getting home before 6 in the morning?! Hm.

And I'm still amazed how one girl can always make me smile, how we always have fun together and how we never need anybody else to make our nights unforgettable. Soulmates, meant to be and friends forever.

Summer has come to an end. Its over, gone and no more. It's all fall and winter coming up, no matter if we want to or not. 

Usually, I'd say, lets make a countdown until next spring and lets get ready for Summer 09. But for once, I'm not going to do that. For once, fall and winter doesnt sound so bad. Despite the bad weather, its a period of time where you have a reason to stay in bed, a reason to watch tv all day and another reason to just stay inside. 

Today the weather is just horrible and i found my way out of it. Close the curtains and the door, light a candle and sit down - relax. 

Life is not so bad,

if you do something about it.

And thats exactly what im about to do.

A little too much, a little too fast

Headache, stomach pain and all other symptoms of stress. Maybe i work just a little too much, and maybe my grades are a little too good for me to be able to be happy at the same time. But once youre in the circle, its hard as hell to get out. What i mean is that im used to getting a certain amount of money every month and im used to a "well done" from the teachers. 

Not getting that, and not getting it on purpose - how could that make me happier? Well... i dont know, but what i do know is that i cant keep doing this bullshit anymore. 

Work or school, take a pic - both cant be a "well done. " At least not with a happy face. 

Fuck im sick of life. Why cant every night be like a Friday night? 

Why cant school be in an inspirational environment, with fun stuff?

Why does every thing has to be so BORING?!

Sick, sick and sick.

Tired.

And everything SUCKS.

THe dot over the I would be,

2900 happiness is not available for Swedish viewers. 

WHATS UP WITH THAT?!

And now im coming back down.

I bet everyone has been waiting for this one ;) I know i know... probably not. But GOD let me pretend for a while.

When i left of, i was crazy in love and flying on pretty pink clouds way up high. I must 

say, that feeling is the best ever. Yes, love is the best drug there is. Plus, it's completely healthy too (until you get your heartbroken which can lead to suicide - not too healthy, no). 

But this time, im back down to earth. And i've given it a lot of thoughts and I've realized - what i love the most is the falling in love part. The rest is basically expensive, waste of time, a ticking bomb and pointless - until you find that ONE that you want to spend the rest of your life with. So this is why i decided to stay single. 

Nothing wrong with Dennis, oh no - he has it all except... something that I'm longing for and im not quite sure what. I just now it's not right. So i might as well keep on living my happy single life with my awesome single friends.

And btw, Ida has now joined the squad! To bad Henrik, she's all mine now and there's no taking back. 

GO SINGLE!

Where's the alcohol at?

Because tonight Im so inspired. 

It's bowling on the schedule tonight. And even though Im not playing, it will be fun. Im sure. It's me and all my girls, and i guess we'll be playing against some guys. Anyways, we're gonna rock it as usual. The bad thing is, i work tomorrow morning at 9. That SUCKS, so i'll be the party pooper tonight. Believe it or not. 

Tomorrow night Im going on mine and Dennis's first real date. And if i were you, i would be jealous. On the menu there will be movies and dinner. Feels like one of those dates back in the days. Cute, or what?

But for some reason, there will be no clubbing. 

What's happening to me dude? Seriously. 

A weekend without clubbing, what kind of weekend is that?

Hopefully, a great one.

The drug is love. And damn it feels good.

Im walking on pink clouds. Im high up there, and i never wanna leave again.

Im amazed about how fast I've fallen, and how good it feels. Because it does, and it feels so right and  now, i just hope that it stays this way. My heart can not take another fall without a catch. Not right now, not this year.

So yes, of course im scared to death. But it's a chance i have to take and a thing i have to do. Because I'd rather regret falling than regret i never tried.

To the love story,

how cute isn't this?

Bored to death at work and I decided to text him. 5 min later, he's there. A huge hug, another kiss and a Big Red Rose.

That kind of romance is what i want to brag about. 

Where has this guy been all my life?

<3<3<3

Today goes by slow... crazy slow.

Another day of over sleeping, and now I decided to just go to Denmark a little bit earlier than i have to. Im going shopping - as always. 

I just got paid and i need to spend the money, thats the way it goes. 

But im not feeling too good today. Don't know why, but i just have that awkward feeling in my stomach and it wont go away. Plus Im having a bad hair day. 

Summation:

Im having a bad day.

And the beat goes IN IN IN

With four hours of sleep, red bull and some vodka i made it through another night at IN. 

Great times, with great people. 

You know what i hate about club nights? It's the walking home part. You're just so tired and damn, it feels like Malmo is on the other side of the world. But last night, was bad - but not as bad. Hours of waiting for buses and trains, and hours of talking on the phone with Him, falling asleep to his voice. Which is the best part of the worst.

Today I've been enjoying my hang over with a movie and some fast food. Probably gained about 10 pounds this weekend. All drunken-food-needs and alcohol consuming is not the best for someone who watches her weight. 

And it was a weekend that i wont remember,

with people I'll never forget. 

I want you to lay me down in a bed of roses...

It looked like last night was going to be nothing worth, and it turned out so good. I dont know how i always do it, but somehow i manage to make things happen.

From work,

to an engagement-party to IN. And fuck there was many people i knew at IN last night, and guess what. Remember when i told you guys there's something missing about IN? Well, there's not anymore. And i think im falling in love. But schh... Don't 

tell anyone. 

So cheers for the best club ever created. And Cheers for My Birthday Girl!

Chicago summer 08

and

Malmö summer 09 <3

It's you and me Char. 

Forever and ever.

What to do, what to do. 

I was in town before school today and seriously, there's nothing worth buying when it comes to clothing. So i guess I'll be going naked saturday night. Think the security guard will let me in? Think my friends will let me out? Na... Not really. So im on a mission impossible. 

Thats alright though. Because who handles an impossible mission better than Missy? Hm. Exactly.

I said you can have whatever you like,

Late night sex, so wet and so tight

Living in DK

Wow. I've never realized how expensive it is to live at a hotel for a longer time until now. 

Between the 5th november to the 26th i'll be living in CPH for a project work and i have to be the one who finds the living. And since its school who pays, it has to be somewhat cheap. 

Any suggestions?

Ive been searching FOREVER. And since that fucking sensation white event is held the 15th almost all hotels are unavailable. Wtf is that? 

Four days to go.

I got this message on my phone saying, "Tonight its Etage (a club), come and join us on a Monday to celebrate the new week". Well, im sure thats the right way to start tuesday. NOT. 

It was one thing going out on Mondays during summer break, because, hello, its summer break! But when its school the day after - its a big no no. Not even a party princess would do that. Its just stupid and it messes with your grades. 

And The Malmo Festival is over, gone, the fair has ended for this year. But Im disappointed, very mucho. Not because its over, because it sucked. This year have def. been the worst year so far when it comes to stands, rides and music. Too many people and not enough to do. I give the fair a D. Its not failure, only because the Donuts still rock my world. Congrats! You guys did something right.

To one thing to another, its only three more days until weekend and weekend means what? PAAAAARTY. Drink it up. And this one, 

I'm singing,

We're gonna party like its your birthday,

We're gonna zip bacardi like its y

our birthday...

You find me in da club.

IN turns 12 and Sofie turns 19. Lucky you :) 

Incase you wanted to know...

This is The Dream Guy. FUCK he's good.

And have you seen him Dance?

Gah! 

Now we're talking.

Sunday - birth control and still fighting that cold

Sleeping, watching movies, listening to music. Zippin leftovers from last night, talking gossip on the phone with my BF, doing everything a sunday should include in everyones life. And im loving it. 

Not so fantastic is the fact that im still sick and i sound like a 60 year old smoker. But some drugs before i say goodnight and I'll be fine tomorrow morning.

Another thing i thought of today, speaking of pills. I used to be on birth control, yes, now everyone knows! Seriously though, i stopped and I've never felt this wonderful before. I guess i have, before i started with B.C - but i mean, i just can't remember how it was like. I feel happy, confident and i want That all the time. 

So screw birth control - and not with it. 

There's something about you,

how your feet move,

your body rollin,

touching.

There's something i can't forget,

what i can't get over,

something new,

about you.

Expensive night for sure. But oh.. its only papers with numbers.

Fuck how it rained this morning. It was hell getting home from the club. I was cold, wet and tired. 

I lost my G. watch, my keys and yes, my money. I shrug my shoulders for it though, shit happe

ns and i had fun. Material things are easy to get new ones of. 

My legs, they hurt! Ouch we danced. And ouch we danced a little bit too much, a little bit too crazy. But what is a night without feeling totally beaten up waking up in the morning? It's a proof of not giving it your all. 

So on our way home i realized why Muslims wear their "cover thing" here in Sweden. Its the perfect protection against rain. And it always rains here. Good one you guys, i might consider joining your religion. 

We were at IN, a club in DK, yea you know all about it, i know. Its a badass place and the night always ends up being successful. And guess who's going next weekend? ME :) And all my girls too. Sofies birthday, the 30th. 

Dancing, drinking, partying, going crazy, flirting, meeting strange people and just rockin. The keywords of IN.

But oh yea, there's one missing...

This one goes out to you Dad.

I love you. 

And get well soon. 

Can't stand having you at the hospital, so far away.

Stupid cars...

You must have a pretty god damn good

Guardian Angel.

School and some other yadayada about Friday

Another day in hell have past by. Actually, school is not That bad. But its still school with boring teachers and annoying freshmen. The fact that the weather sucks, i feel sick and we don't actually have a building to be in - makes it worse. 

But with awesome friends, its pretty easy to make it through anyways.

Enough about that. And more about Tomorrow. I cant stop talking about it. Why? Well, its just a regular friday with partying at night. Its just that its been a while since i was a

ble to go out. I mean, really go out. Do the whole, pre-party and after-party thing. So im going all in tomorrow. 

Im planning on buying some new fresh clothes, some new liquor to drink and why not That too. It will be an awesome night. 

I'll practice my bartender skills, do my two step and party like a ROCKSTAR.

See you at The Dance Floor.

Friday Night. Fridayyyyy, friday. FRIDAY! Alright, so its only 2 more days left. And i feel that i can handle it. I can do it. Because, we're gonna have the time of our lives friday night. 

I had no school today, pretty bad ass. Then i bought i new cell phone, just for fun. I like it, its cool and im very excited about having two ^^ 

Ill be back later to update more. Im just so excited about life right now. I need to go out, run a bit, scream a bit - do whatever i feel like. Because thats what ive decided to do more of. 

What I want.

Mamma Mia

...here i go again. My my, how could i resist you? 

As you know, school started again and im back as a school girl. But, for the last time. Well, except college. But thats another thing, right? 

Im so excited about Friday night, you have NO idea! Me and Sofie are so going out to shake it, shake it, shake it. What im not so excited about is tomorrow morning. Getting up at 6 is just not my thing. But whatever, a girl gotta do what she gotta do. 

So this movie, Mamma mia, its just... wow it makes me think, think of everything. And it reminds me of love - duh, its a love movie. Seriously though, it gives me a little bit of hope that its not over yet. That true love might be somewhere out there. But it also reminds me of the fact that theres no stressing about finding it. You can be 50 and still fall in love. So maybe i should just get over myself, move on and keep living my happy single life. Because i gotta admit, its pretty fun being able to do anything without having anyone complaining about it. But then... i miss having someone around. Someone how you know will be there when you open the door coming home from work. Someone that you share everything with and that you know loves you at your worst. 

I miss being in that situation where everything is ok, as long as you have him. 

True love. I've had it, I've lost it, I'll find it again. 

Last night out. School at 2 p.m

School is no longer out for the summer. Its back, and im not ready to face the last year out of 13. I wanna keep the summer going forever and ever. Speaking of forever, Chris Brown singing Forever hit the number 1 on The Voice Tv today. 3rd was Just Dance... But she'll make it to the top as well, i know it. 

Alright. Tonight its going down as the last night out until the hard life begins again. Today we're gonna party at the Festival right here, downtown. There's gonna be tons of people though. Smashed and hot, thats the true Festival feelings. 

And im so buying Donuts. And we're so competing about who licks their lips last.  And im so gonna win. 

They're all loosing it at the beach tonight. Everyone, except me.

Beach Rave in Klagshamn, and i turned it down. Yes, I did. Why? Hah... good question. But i must say i dont regret it - not yet. Because when your as wiped out as i am right now, sitting at home with some comfortable clothes on is pretty nice. But dont think thats all ive been doing tonight. Oh no. 

Private party in Malmo, is something i usually take as the last option. But today i actually wanted to just drink, chill and be with the people i love. Plus, now i have some new friends ;) Seriously though, i had fun

tonight. 

We sang songs, took shots, talked and spilled stuff all over. Poor guy who lives there. I feel bad for him, so wanna see his face tomorrow morning. Hah...

But now its time for another saturday night to come to its end. I need sleep. I need my bed. And i so need sleep and so much my bed. 

Goodnight all you party people. And we're all excited about tomorrow night. Barbecue at The beach, unless rain. 

Bounce

What to do a friday night when you have to get up at 6 in the morning? Let me tell you. 

Get a drink, eat some good food, listen to music and feel it. Even though you might not be able to go out, you can still have your own little party. And thats exactly what im doing tonight. 

When beat goes boom, i get low. 

And when the time is running out, i finish it off and hit the bed. 

And tomorrow morning, will be so much easier. 

Bonus, 

enough of these nights will make me rock the dance floor at the clubs. 

One more day until weekend. But as usual, i wont be able to enjoy it that much. Because i work, as always. 

But anyways, I'll make sure ill take time to at least visit the Festival in Malmo once

, that starts tomorrow. I love that Festival, its just bad ass. 

Music, food, people. My kind of place. See you there.

The deepest love.

It’s when I can’t decide between hi or hello.

It’s when the impossible is to say goodbye, even if I have to go.

 

It’s when reality is better than dreaming,

It’s when sleep looses its meaning.

 

It’s when a touch is more than just a touch,

It’s when a simple word changes things – sometimes even too much.

 

It’s when love takes over,

And when I have the strength to just stay sober.

 

It’s when I see you,

And all I’m thinking,

Is I do.

You find me in da bed.

No, not in the dirty way. I just think i've been waring myself out a bit. I feel like theres a cold coming on and i guess, its time to rest. 

And whats better than a really good movie, a nice big comfortable bed with a big cup of hot chocolate when youre feeling sick? Not much. Id say, impossible to beat. 

So guess what im doing tonight =) 

You find me in da club

So last night turned out being pretty good. I was deathly tired and exhausted, but Sofie convinced me to go out anyways. 

We did and we stayed until 3 in the morning. Not too bad, despite the fact that Sofie had to work at 3.30. 

And i realized a few things. Clubs are for enjoyment, being with your friends, drinking, having fun, flirting without any intentions of anything else but boosting confidence. Clubs are not a dating spot, its not where you meet your future husband - its a place for a one night scandal and nothing else. 

And sometimes i wonder what we're running on. Must be something good.

To go, or not to go - that is the question.

Once again its monday and since its summer break, that club - etage, is open for +18. Its pretty good i guess, since its normally +21 on mondays and like... +25 on the weekends. Another things is, thats its free. But still, do i want to go or do i not want to go? I guess its not really about wanting and not wanting. Its more about, if i have the energy to do it. 

First of all, i work all day - leaving in 5 min. Second of all, i have to take a cab home from the club whenever we decide to leave. And im kind of sick of paying +300 just to get home. IT SUCKS!

But we'll see, ill decide later on. 

Hm.